Often Christians are accused of being mean spirited because they oppose gay marriage or are against gay sex in general. I can’t say that all Christians show love and compassion to those in the LGBTQ community. However, I wish they did.
But sadly, Christians too, are in desperate need of a Savior. We all need Jesus. And some of us who follow Jesus have some serious apologizing to do. No, we don’t need to apologize for our beliefs. But we do need to apologize because of our closed hearts.
This blog is not an excuse to be mean spirited or bigoted. It’s an opportunity to start a conversation with those of other beliefs. There are real moral standards out there. Standards that go way beyond our feelings and our culture. And these are standards we can know. Perhaps it’s time to think outside the cultural box that we call “the norm,” and truly consider where our standards come from.
The False Argument For Why Gay Sex Is OK
Christians are told they should be ashamed if they oppose gay sex whenever it’s:
1. Consensual;
2. Between two adults;
3. And not hurting anyone. (if the couple is happy with what they’re doing, shame on YOU for trying to stop their happiness.)
But do these standards really hold up? Is it really whatever floats your boat, as long as it’s with happy consenting adults and no one is getting hurt? And how do we determine if others are getting hurt? Is it limited to the two people involved? Is it society? Or is the hurt something that happens on a deeper level; something subtle, invisible but yet very powerful?
Did You Know That The Same Case for Gay Sex Can Also Be Made for Consensual Incest?
So where do we draw the line? What if a 60 year old mom wants to have sex with her 30 year old son? Are you OK with that? Are you willing to apply the same standard for incest as you do with gay sex? If yes, where does it stop? And if not, then how is this different?
Is Incest OK if there won’t be a pregnancy and
1. It’s consensual;
2. It’s between two adults; and
3. They are steadfastly in a monogamous relationship and happy with what they’re doing?
What about sex with animals? Is it OK if both the man and the dog are happy? Is anyone getting hurt in these arrangements? If you’re not OK with this, welcome to the club! But why is this any different?
We do many things to our animals. We chain them up, we put them in pens, we eat them, and we feed them lousy food. And yet, there’s something about sex that make it all very different. Isn’t there?
But Sex With Animals or Parents Is Illegal, Gay Marriage Is Not
Often people will say “but in the last two examples, it’s clearly illegal!” In other words, it’s immoral simply because the law says so.
Yes, we are required to follow the law. But does the law really make something moral? Two hundred years ago, freeing slaves was illegal. And so for that matter was gay marriage. If the law is the same as morality, wouldn’t that make abolitionists and even gay activists into immoral criminals?
And yet, we revere Martin Luther King and Abraham Lincoln… why? The answer is because they stood for higher moral standards that were above the law. They knew that man’s law was just a shadow of the real morality. They knew of moral standards that went far beyond their culture and what was commonly accepted by the majority.
So we can’t hide behind the law to figure out if something is right or wrong. The law is like the wind. It changes all the time and not always for the better.
Could Sex Be Something Intrinsically Special and Worth Protecting?
Most of us would blanch at the idea of incest or bestiality. We know in our hearts and in our heads that it simply ain’t right. But why? Surely this is bigger than just the culture we live in. In fact, these sexual taboos are worldwide. These are standards that come from outside of us. They are beyond us and above us.
Everyone knows that there’s something different about sex. People act differently toward one another when they’ve had sex together. And people go into jealous rages when they find out their partner is having sex with someone else. Sex changes things. It always has. And it always will.
It doesn’t matter whether you’re a Christian, atheist or agnostic. Your beliefs don’t change the reality about sex. Sex powerfully affects relationships. It even affects your own body. Just think of all those people addicted to pornography. The studies show it impacts every aspect of their lives, even the neurological.
Sex is like fire. Fire is great in the fireplace but lousy on the curtains. Fire has to be kept in a very special environment with lots of protective covering. If you have fire in the wrong place, it rages out of control. And people get hurt.
The source of morality has got to be more than our feelings. It has to be something beyond our culture. Something beyond our passions.
Christians believe that morality comes from a moral law giver. An active personal God that you can know if you ask Him into your life. This God has standards that are meant to protect us and give us life to the full. And yes, some of these standards go against our feelings. Many of these standards are contrary to our impulses. And not surprisingly, a good number of these standards relate to sex.
You may not agree with Christians about gay sex. But I urge you to seek the God who knows the answers. This is the God who transformed my life, and the lives of countless others. He will help you understand these things if you ask Him directly. This is what I did back in 1994. And I encourage you to meet Him.
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